Certainly sounds as though you were dressed well enough – not that I’m any great judge. The Italian color code is difficult for us non-Italians to get right, but is basically no more than three, subtle, colors – different shades of the same color are OK, I’m told.

There is a lot of conformity – Italians, in the main, do not go for loud colors. To be honest, though, I don’t think it was the way you were dressed. Indeed, perhaps you looked too wealthy, and this sparked some envy. Indeed, your treatment in upscale shops and hotels would seem to suggest this – not that this should be held against you at all. It could just be the difference there is between Italian courtesy and US courtesy, but I’m not convinced.

As for being ripped off too, that could have been because you looked well-heeled, and they thought they’d have a go. Unfortunately, this does happen in Italy (and in other countries), but it’s inexcusable, and does no favors for Italy. I’m sure you’ve been spreading the word on your treatment in Italy – as indeed I would do in your position.

If you do ever decide come to Italy again (I think this is doubtful), dragging your protesting husband behind you, before you come, read a few blogs like this one – you’ll find some good ones on BlogfromItaly’s links page – and don’t be afraid to write and ask about where to go, and where to eat etc. Italy, perhaps more than some other countries, requires more study before embarking on a trip – and a little preparation can help you avoid being ripped off. If you want to try Venice, for example, I know someone who can point you towards the right places to try.

Very sorry to hear that your trip to Italy has left you with a memory of the memory of the hatefullness. Very sad. Not at all good.

Once again, thanks for mentioning this.

Best regards,

Alex

Hi Alex,

We live in UES Manhattan, a few blocks off Madison Avenue. Perhaps you’re correct: That we simply didn’t have the right look. I think we dressed pretty average. My husband was wearing a black leather Feragamo jacket and I wore a Burberrry gold mini trenchcoat or a Barbour brown jacket. We are both slender build, in our 40s to 50. Certainly across the board, we noticed the “Look” consists of one’s favorite latest style jeans, and a jacket either black, grey or tan. Everybody wore black, grey or tan ONLY. In Milan, we noticed the subtlety of more tailored styling to a jacket, but the colors were restricted to black, grey and tan, with an occasional touch of red accent. Like a red scarf, or red shoes. Red was the only accent color. It was uncanny to see so much conformity. We tend to wear different colors, and do not restrict our clothing to black, grey or tan. So maybe the museum clerks, the cafe servers, the store clerks didn’t like our colors. But all grooming and fashion sense issues aside. Perhaps, it was the degree of politesse.

Most of the time we are polite people, but I wouldn’t describe us as overly polite. Without exception, we were treated very well at high end hotels, and upscale shops. It was everywhere else we were trashed. My assessment is that the more educated sophisticated Italians do not indulge themselves in this brutal “prison guard” behavior. But there are far more average people to go around to make life effectively unpleasant. Certainly dishonesty, and over-charging is going to hurt Italy’s tourism over time. And the petty rudeness of museum clerks, average store clerks, and restaurant staff is going to ensure low returns to no returns! But what will endure for life times, is the memory of the hatefullness.

This seems to explain why levels of customer service in Italy tend to leave a little to be desired at times, and so does this chunk of your comment:

…”incredibly, as a manager, I discovered that you cannot ask your employees to say ‘Buon Giorno” or have a nice day.”

Incredible! Sort of encourages poor customer service!

Low pay levels and boredom do not help matters either, something needs to be done to cure both problems.

As for the rude Milanese, you are probably right – I’ve been here so long, I don’t even notice it any more! But, on the rare occasions that I make it back to the UK, I’m usually stunned by the levels of common courtesy which exist. Compared to Italy, everyone seems so polite!

Italians, alas, some and not all, will rip people off if they think they can get away with it – and it is easy to get away with it if you are unlikely to see your hapless victim ever again. I keep on pointing it out, but the Italian concept of honesty is somewhat different from the UK and UK concept! At times, it is a lot different!

Best,

Alex

But please see the one prior in which I talked about all the wonderful sites to see & do (from that same trip).

Francesca Maggi

http://burntbythetuscansun.blogspot.com/2009/09/tourism-in-italy-petroleum-or-quicksand.html

http://www.touringtracks.com